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Because today is an 8-hour workday for me, I took the 6:25 am train instead of the 5:23 am train.

Wow. What a difference an hour of sleep makes. I woke up with a bounce in my step, instead of feeling like zombie-woman.

It’s a reoccurring theme here – my struggle to get enough sleep. I fill my days too full and make my expectations too high. I set myself up for failure and exhaustion.

It makes me very disappointed in myself that I am still struggling with this. Being healthy is not just eating well and exercising. It’s a triad of eating well, exercising AND getting enough rest.

I tried to combat my exhaustion by taking naps the past two weekends. But a 2 or 3-hour nap in the middle of the day? Or two 1-hour naps in one day? That doesn’t seem right (even if it feels right).

I’ve been putting a lot of hope into this 3-day weekend at the river with my family – that it will be relaxing and easy-going. I imagine myself sleeping on the beach, closing my eyes and relaxing on the boat, having relaxing conversations with my (immediate) family, enjoying leisure activities… we’ll see. I’ve learned it’s best not to have my expectations too high (ever, really) when going somewhere where my imaginary schedule has to be coordinated with 9 others people’s.  

And however the weekend turns out, what happens when I come back? I’ll still be skimping on sleep, I’m sure.

You know what’s exhausting? Trying to give someone what they want, when what they want is constantly changing*.

I am sick of trying to figure people (and their mood swings) out. I know it’s their issue, not mine, but still, it’s exhausting and wearing me down.

My therapist pointed out that when someone is really detail oriented and likes to pick things apart, that by letting it ruin my day, I am doing the same thing – focusing in on the irrelevant details. What a good point. So I am working on not letting the small things build up, but in the meantime… ugh. I feel like I am constanlty being attacked.

*Because they are crazy, and want one thing one day and something different the next.

Welcome to week 2 of marathon training! If you click on the activity links after the dates, it will take you to the Garmin connect website for full stats.

Day 8 | Monday, June 22: Cross-train for 30 minutes

Welcome summer, you’re right on time! On Monday, it was 85°F but “felt like 90°F” according to weather.com. Uh, wasn’t it just in the mid 70s last week?! That’s okay, the heat was no big deal on this 2 mile walk. Steven joined me again. I really miss running with Steven. I enjoy chatting with him while I work out.

I’ve been wondering if I should get my bike ready, or do my cross-training at the office gym on Mondays for something different than walking. I think for now I will stick to walking.

Distance: 2.00 miles | Time: 30:04 | 1: 15:12 | 2: 14:49 | 3: 00:02

Day 9 | Tuesday, June 23: Run 3 Miles

I worked out with a coworker at the office gym on Tuesday night. I wasn’t really feeling up to it (I have been feeling down and not too social lately), but figured it would be better to work out indoors, as opposed to the mid 90 degree weather outside. I still had a rough time though. After one mile, I felt like I was going to throw up (Hello falafel pita!). I slowed it down, since it was supposed to be a “comfortable” run, and spent the next two miles bitching about my Memorial Day Weekend (we had some catching up to do!). The bitching made the last two miles zip by.

Lesson learned – stick to my diet throughout the day! My coach took me out to lunch to celebrate a project we completed, and I had an awesome falafel pita and homemade chips (A shout out to Cafe Mediterra is due. If you’re just south of the loop, check them out.)! It didn’t sit well in my stomach though. I need to be even more careful about what I eat before I run!

Distance: 3:00 miles | Time: 29:23 | 1: 9:23 | 2: 10:00 | 3: 10:00

Day 10 | Wednesday, June 24: Run 5 miles

Well, this was an interesting run! I didn’t start until 7:30 pm and it was still 92°F outside! I realized it wasn’t going to be a super speedy, easy run, so I went with the mentality that I would just go out there and have fun. I strapped on my hydration belt (and brought my cell phone in case of an emergency), and put two full water bottles and a bucket of ice on our porch. My plan was to run a loop around our house, stopping for water and ice.

During my warm-up walk, I ran into my neighbor, Fritz,  and his daughter, Maya. We walked together for a bit, and she said, “Daddy, I want to ride in the stroller.” Then the words came out of my mouth, “Do you want me to push her in the running stroller?” So, Maya got strapped in, and off we went. I ran with her from her house, all the way around the park, and back home, making up the first 1.6 miles of the run. It was actually fun to run with the stroller. Those were my fastest splits! She told me cute little stories for most of our run together. When we got back to her house, Fritz and his wife, May, were waiting outside with the camera and video camera. How cute! And they brought out cold water for me. What a fun way to start the run!

Isn’t Maya cute?!

While I was running with the stroller, I passed a group of three young girls, whom I actually ended up passing 5 or so more times during my run. Well, the first time we passed them, instead of warning the younger girl that we were coming, one of the older girls just pulled on her pig-tails to pull her off the sidewalk and let us pass! Poor girl. That must have hurt!

After I dropped Maya off, I noticed there was a group of about 8 kids riding their bikes in their street. It was mostly boys, probably ages 12 or so. They were taking up the entire two-way street with their bikes. Cars would come by, and slow down, and the kids wouldn’t let them pass. When the cars honked their horns, the kids would finally move, but finger the cars as they drove by. This made me feel really disappointed. I wanted to follow these kids home and ask their parents if they knew what they were doing, but hey, if the kids were doing that in the first place, I doubt their parents would really care. That’s just so dangerous, and irresponsible.

I stopped by our house to go to the bathroom about two-thirds into the run, and when I came out of the house, I dropped some ice cubes in the front and back of my bra. Of course, those three young girls happened to be walking by our house then. Ha ha. They probably thought that was a strange thing to do. Hey, it felt good.

And, this question isn’t related to the ice cubes, believe me, but how can I be nipping out for an entire 5-mile run in 90 degree weather?! (see paw prints in photo above)

This was a surprisingly good, fun run, despite the heat! It left me in a good mood.

Sweaty Happy Kim

Distance: 5.01 miles | Time: 47:32 | 1: 9:02 | 2: 9:16 | 3: 9:42 | 4: 9:47 | 5: 9:40 | 6: 00:02

Day 11 | Thursday, June 25: Run 3 miles

Another fun lunch time run with Erin! The forecast called for rain, but it never happened, so we ventured out into the scorching sun (I don’t really feel like I am exaggerating when I say that). I was definitely drenched with sweat by the time I got back to the office, and boy, did that shower feel good!

No rain in the view from my office!

Every other Thursday is a “tele-work” (meaning “work at home”) day for most people in my office, so it’s fairly quiet. With that being said, I was looking forward to running with Erin! I needed to talk to someone! I hope I didn’t talk her ear off.

We did a good job of running slower than we did last week, but we were still running considerably fast (for us). I wish I could run with Erin more often. I can tell we are going faster when we run, but it doesn’t bother me because my mind is on the conversation. I love runs like this. I am looking forward to our next one together!

Distance: 3.18 miles | Time: 29:06 | 1: 9:19 | 2: 9:31 | 3: 8:49 | 4: 1:25

Day 12 | Friday, June 26: Rest

Day 13 | Saturday, June 27: Run 5 miles

I was super excited when I checked the temperature at 6:00 am and saw cooler temps:

59°F and feels like 59°F! Hurray!

That forecast totally makes getting up “early” on a weekend worth it!

I met my neighbor, Fritz, and we ran an easy 5 miles around the neighborhood. It just flew by. That is what happens when you have great company to talk to! I am so lucky to have this happen two runs in a row!

Around mile 3.5, I knew I had to go to the bathroom, so we started to run back towards my house. This is the second time this has happened while running with Fritz. He’s such a cool guy. He said to me, “If you have to go, just go! It’s no big deal!” Ha! I told him that during a race, I would, but that we were so close to home, I could make it. It’s nice to know it wouldn’t bother him if I went on my leg though. Ha ha ha.

Distance: 5.01 miles | Time: 49:25 | 1: 9:54 | 2: 10:09 | 3: 9:58 | 4: 9:39 | 5: 9:40 | 6: 00:02

Day 14 | Sunday, June 28: Run 9 miles

My alarm was set for 6:30 Sunday morning, but I was having a hard time getting out of bed. Enter Alarm Clock Kitty Cat:

Data seriously makes me crazy by rubbing his teeth and whiskers all over my face when I am trying to sleep, but today he actually helped me get out of bed. Thanks, Data.

I got to the park by 7:00 and started running at 7:20 and got back home after 9:00. That is a lot of time for a 9-mile run! What am I going to do when I have to run further… wake up at 5:00?!

I think I ran this a bit faster than I should have for a training run, but that’s okay. I will surely slow down as I add more mileage. I enjoyed this run. It was nice and sunny and breezy.

More photos from the Nippersink Forest Preserve:

My savior – the public restroom!

Distance: 9.00 miles | Time: 1:22:16 | 1: 9:10 | 2: 9:11 | 3: 9:22 | 4: 9:09 | 5: 9:00 | 6: 9:04 | 7: 9:16 | 8: 9:15 | 9: 8:44 | 10: 00:02

Week Summary: 25 Miles

Compared to last week, my runs this week were more fun and easier. I think that’s because I went out prepared for the heat, and because I ran with friends more often.

One thing I noticed though, is that my running clothes are really starting to stink. I wash them twice and they still won’t come clean. The July issue of Runner’s World has an article called “Stink Stoppers,” reviewing eight new shirts that are stink resistant. Unfortunately, I don’t have the cash right now to buy a new wardrobe, so… any advice?

Alright, it’s the big question! CourtneyInControl asked, “What made you decide you want to go vegan?”

Disclaimer: My intent is not to convert you to veganism, just to share my feelings on the subject!

I’ve been a vegetarian for over 8 years. The idea of becoming vegan (not eating milk or egg products) did not become intriguing to me until I lived in Rome, in 2006. I volunteered at an animal shelter with a lot of vegans who shared information with me about the lifestyle. I believed in the cause, as well as the health benefits of the diet, but honestly, I was NOT ready to make the change yet. I didn’t want to spend time worrying or caring about what was in  my food, especially when living in Rome! I wanted to be carefree and eat as much pasta and gelato as I could fit in in 7 months (rest assured, I accomplished that)! I didn’t want to go to the trouble of learning even more of the Italian language to read food labels, and ask waiters in Italian, “Does that have dairy or egg in it?” I was just lazy.

Since then though, I made a somewhat conscious decision to cut back on dairy and egg products. I didn’t eat them that often. When I lived by myself, I didn’t even keep those things in my apartment. BUT, I did enjoy the occasional slice of pizza, bowl of ice cream, or scrambled eggs.

Since then, I’ve constantly run across information on factory farming and animal exploitation. Honestly, I do NOT search this information out, because I cannot stomach it. If I read/see/hear something cruel, I CANNOT get it out of my mind. It makes me feel sick.

But since I kept finding myself running into this information, I did force myself to think about it, and came to the conclusion that I must use my actions to voice what I believe:

I believe that animals should not be exploited for our gain. I believe they are sentient beings, who should have the basic right of living a free life. I believe they should not be used for food, clothing, research, or entertainment, even if there is no unnecessary suffering.

I feel like cutting out dairy and eggs is one small step for me. Animals are used for more than just food. There are many ways they are exploited that I do not agree with. But I honestly cannot go on a rampage through my house throwing away all of my leather products, glue, the tires off my car, etc. I can only make small steps towards a more compassionate lifestyle.

I really want to share some of the awful things I’ve learned about animal exploitation, but I don’t want to ruin your day, if you are like me and cannot get the images out of your head, so I am going to share some links below.

Thanks for reading with an open mind.

(more…)

Forget Wednesday’s cookies, because these taste just like the real thing:

Recipe here.

Steven wasn’t 100% pleased with Wednesday’s vegan chocolate chip cookies, so he searched his new favorite website, vegweb.com for ideas. The new recipe he found truly tastes just like the Nestle Toll House ones. The recipes takes a bit of preparation, but is worth it.

The dough looks like chocolate chip cookie dough!

Our cookie sheets sure do look used!

We also tried this “Craving-Cure Cookies” recipe – similar to an oatmeal raisin. I liked them because they are dense and chewy. Steven didn’t like them as much, for that reason.

I had my eyes set on this one, because it was full of raisins.

Our neighbors came over for dinner, so we had a lot of options for dessert:

Banana Muffins, Craving-Cure Cookies, and Chocolate Chip Cookies.

They must have liked the vegan treats, because they took some home! But, there is still enough to share with Diane and E at Saturday’s dinner date in the country.

I think we went a little overboard in our sweets making today. Which is funny, since I gave up sweets for so long for Lent, and didn’t even crave them anymore. Now, since I run so much, I don’t even feel guilty about eating sweets (if in moderation!). In fact, I don’t feel guilty about much that I eat. But I won’t talk about that – I might jinx myself.

If your life was made into a movie, what genre would the movie be (drama, action, romance, comedy, adventure, crime/gangster, horror, musical, science fiction, war, western, historical, family-friendly, etc.)?

I like to think that mine would be made into a comedy. Not because I am very funny, but because I find humor in a lot of the situations I am in.

I hate how I can feel my inner thighs rubbing together* when I wear a skirt. But… I love how breezy it is on hot summer days. Comfort (temperature) wins!

Yesterday was my second quarterly panel report, so I wore a skirt/suit outfit. Then there was a discussion within my team about the merits of wearing a skirt. Some people actually have very strong opinions about wearing or not wearing a skirt. I was kind of surprised. But kind of not. Because some people just like to present their opinions in that strong manner.

Anyway, I have a big box in my closet full of skirts. I got it down this morning and pulled out one of my favorites – this brown/black/orange/white floral print from H&M.

I’ve had this skirt a couple of years, but I just can’t find the right top to wear with it.

With the heat we’ve been having, I’ll probably be wearing skirts more often this summer than I normally would. I just hope I don’t get too much flak about it. Because people generally don’t like to be teased about what they are wearing. Or really, even have it noticed, unless it’s to give a compliment.

*Will they ever NOT rub together…?

I didn’t get home until 8:45 last night. I was a little bit frustrated that my train was late, but all of that frustration washed away when I opened the door and smelled… fresh chocolate chip cookies! Steven decided to try this vegan recipe. How awesome is it to come home to fresh cookies? Steven is such a sweetie. I am so lucky to have a husband who loves to cook and experiment in the kitchen.

They turned out very thick on their own. Steven pressed down the second batch, but I liked the big, thick, chewy ones.

Nom Nom Nom

Steven had to make some substitutions to the recipe. We didn’t have unbleached flour, so he used all-purpose. And we didn’t have raw sugar, so he used half white and half brown sugar. He found out that most white sugar is not vegan, as it is often filtered using bone char – an animal product. I am sure as I continue on this vegan journey, I will discover lots of interesting tidbits like that. I will have to accommodate them when I run across them.

Anyway, he thought the cookies were a little bland, that they needed more flavor. He thought they just tasted like sugar cookies with chocolate chips in them – that they were missing that “buttery” (?) taste. I liked that they didn’t have a overpowering taste, as I generally do not consider myself a chocolate chip cookie fan. As you can see, they weren’t laden with chocolate chips. He only used a half of a cup. I don’t like it when chocolate chip cookies are overloaded with chocolate chips. Blah.

With all of that being said, I scarfed down three cookies. Then went almost immediately to bed. These cookies sat like a brick in my stomach, and had me tossing and turning all night. I don’t think it is necessarily the cookie’s fault. I think it is MY fault for eating too much, too fast, too close to bedtime, on an already full stomach.

I got into a bad pattern for awhile in the end of May and beginning of June where I was eating too much in the evening and sleeping very poorly at night. I’d wake up because I feel so uncomfortable and gassy. I would still feel gross when I woke up in the morning. That’s not a good way to start a day.

And the dumb thing is, I couldn’t figure out why I was tossing and turning all night. I just kept repeating the same actions over and over. It wasn’t until I actually slept well, that I looked back and thought, “Hmm, what did I do differently yesterday?”

So, while I’ve always laughed at the theory that you cannot burn off calories you eat in the evening* (because you go to bed), I think I will be making an effort not to eat so close to bedtime.

*I think the advice to “not eat after 7:00 pm” is meant to help people cut back on mindless snacking done after dinner. But it seems to have turned into this belief that calories you eat after 7:00 pm will never be burned off.

Don’t you love it when you are telling a story to a friend, and they supplement your story with details you’ve told them in the past? Basically, when they demonstrate what a good listener they are to you by recalling little tidbits that relate to the new story?

Don’t you hate it when you remember that that good friend, one of the only two you feel like you can talk to at work, is leaving for maternity leave in a month and won’t come back for at least six months?

Hopefully you can only relate to the first two questions.

I’ve noticed that my work day is significantly better if I feel like I have had some level of personal interaction with someone.

That doesn’t happen everyday. I could reach out more. I just don’t want to overshare.

Steven has been encouraging me to try yoga for quite some time. He follows the P90X yoga workout, and really enjoys how relaxed and flexible it makes him feel. He thinks I could use a little calm in my life. I think I could use some flexibility. So I gave it a try yesterday.

Kim = yoga FAIL

I made it 20 minutes into the 90 minute workout and decided I had had one too many downward dogs. I gave it a rest for another 25 minutes until the “pose” section started, and tried some of those stretches. I couldn’t do all of them – it still kicked my butt.

Now, I realize a 90 minute yoga workout is not the best place to start. Maybe someday I can move up to that! For now, does anyone have advice on beginner’s yoga? Any good books, DVD’s, websites? Please keep in mind, my cash is muchos limited.

I really want to get into yoga so I CAN use it as another means to relax and focus, and also gain some flexibility.