Perception is reality? [13]Comments on:

By: Holly

Holly — Mon, 05 Oct 2009 19:42:00 +0000

I really would love to know what others think of me/how they perceive me, but then I realize I’m too sensitive for that and would end up in tears.

Interestingly, I know of a few people who claim to be very optimistic and positive, yet I see them more as pessimists. I think so many people WANT to be the cheerleader girl (but not the ANNOYing cheerleader girl) who never gives up, who is perky and happy on the dreariest day. But it’s OKAY to be sad sometimes, and definitely okay to not always be “on!”

I’ve found that a lot of people who seem to be extremely happy are really just putting up a front for the public; then when they get home at night they are TOTALLY different (my sister used to be like this, and my last roommate, too). Although, having said that, that sounds very pessimistic of me. Hmmm.
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By: Julia

Julia — Fri, 02 Oct 2009 15:40:31 +0000

There are definitely times when I would love to know what people are really thinking about me – like in my oral argument yesterday, I really wanted to know what the “judge” was thinking as I was talking.
I find myself falling into the pessimistic place occassionally as well. Usually when things are just not going well in my life, which I think is pretty normal.
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By: Jen

Jen — Fri, 02 Oct 2009 13:34:40 +0000

You’ve been working on some big long-term goals, though, haven’t you? Going to school and all that? I think the urge to cocoon comes on when you’ve been working hard. Same for getting pessimistic — you might just be tired.
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By: tori

tori — Fri, 02 Oct 2009 13:14:56 +0000

I totally understand this post. Especially the ending part about wanting to spend time with family and relax and also realizing those are not long term goals.

I wish there was a way to know what people think so you can work on changing things about yourself (if you want to or think who they think you are isn’t who you want to be) without having the hurt yucky feelings you get when you hear something about yourself that you don’t like. I constantly wonder what people think about me because I am always so unsure about everything and I am so self critical that I always think people think the worst about me. So I guess I would want to know so I could make sure I come across as myself but I know the things people might say could make me feel bad so I’d have to brace myself for it. I would hope my friends would tell me, nicely, if I had some awful thing that was making me come across really badly or not as I think I am.

This topic is something I think about a lot and I really “get” it and love to know someone else thinks about it too.

For the record, I think you are a fun happy person who cares about others and really takes an interest in what other people are thinking and doing. I think you are pretty awesome. Is that how you see yourself?
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By: SoMi's Nilsa

SoMi's Nilsa — Fri, 02 Oct 2009 12:17:44 +0000

This post has got me thinking … and I may wind up doing a spin on this next week … stay tuned.
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By: Mica

Mica — Fri, 02 Oct 2009 11:10:11 +0000

I hate when people say, “I’m interesting” because usually, that means that they are not. I have a friend who complains about everyone else’s neediness, but s/he is the neediest person ever. It drives me crazy.

I guess I’d want to know what everyone thought of me, though it might be depressing. In any event, it might be a good wake-up call. I’d rather work on changing bad habits that get on people’s nerves than live in ignorant bliss.
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By: Susan

Susan — Fri, 02 Oct 2009 04:41:15 +0000

I always wonder what other people think of me…I’m one of those “quite until you get to know me” kind of people, and I wonder if people think I’m angry or cold or rude or whatever. I’m just shy! I also wonder if I look like an idiot half the time…

I hate when people say, “You know, I’m usually pretty easy going or laid back.” NOT TRUE.
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By: kaylen

kaylen — Fri, 02 Oct 2009 03:46:41 +0000

I would LOVE to have some insight about what people really think of me!!
I think i try to be very open-minded, but I suspect that I am not always.
And I highly dislike snobby attitudes, but I’m certain I have my moments…
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By: Erin

Erin — Fri, 02 Oct 2009 02:30:48 +0000

I’d be terrified to know but, like you said, it would be helpful to understand myself better. For example, I like to think I’m a nice person but I bet some people don’t see me that way at all.

I do have a friend who thinks she has certain characteristics when, really, she’s the complete opposite of them. I try to point it out to her very diplomatically. It’s kind of frustrating, actually. Ask me about it some time
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By: Kim

Kim — Fri, 02 Oct 2009 00:52:12 +0000

Just have to say… I know EXACTLY what you’re talking about. I’ve spent most of my life judging myself based on what other people thought of me (or at least what I *thought* they were thinking). I’ve finally moved past that (for real) but that doesn’t end the fascination about what they’re thinking, you know? And for the same reasons you mentioned, a better sense of myself, a truer understanding, etc. I get this.