I usually wear a waist belt with this shirt. Yesterday I was feeling lazy and didn’t.
Someone asked me if I was pregnant.
“No? Oh, your shirt is just billowy.”
“You don’t want kids? That’s okay.”
Sigh.
The conversation didn’t make me mad, as this person has no filter. It didn’t make me feel bad about how I look. And it didn’t make me regret my clothing choices.
It just made me roll my eyes. You don’t ask people that.
Hi! I'm Kim, a 34-year-old living in Chicagoland with my husband, Steven, and our cats, Khali, Apollo, and Starbuck. I work in the design industry (architecture), follow a vegan lifestyle, am addicted to running, and am an ACE certified personal trainer (working at Essential Fitness, LLC ("Efit"))! I write about a variety of topics, and consider this a "life" blog - a place I can share anything that's on my mind. Please visit the "About" page to get a better idea of who I am! :-)
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wow!! No one has even asked me if i am pregnant and I am and I look it! how rude!
I am happy to hear the people around you are more polite! Ha! I think my thought to all this, really, is that people probably just shouldn’t comment on other’s appearances unless it’s to say something nice, or if it’s a loved one or something.
As someone who actually is pregnant, I can assure you that you don’t look even a little pregnant. I think the question is so rude, that I sometimes say no (even though I obviously am) now when people ask me just to see the expression on on their faces and maybe make them think twice about asking strangers that question!
Ha! I know I totally don’t which is why it threw me for a loop! And, gah, if you really need to ask if someone is pregnant, you don’t ask when they have a tiny little bump that could be a big lunch or a baby. Come the f*ck on.
LOL!!! Ha! That is awesome you say no. Ha ha ha ha.
I’ve been thinking though… what about offering a seat to a pregnant person? It’s the right thing to do, and it’s assuming they are pregnant… I guess it’s another tricky territory – you don’t want to be an A$$ and not offer it, but what if they aren’t? Blah.
I only answer “no” to the people who touch my belly as they ask the question. Dude, I don’t know you. Don’t touch me!
As for the seat thing, I do think it is a nice gesture. If you just offer the seat without saying “because you are pregnant.” Then if they aren’t pregnant, you are just being generally nice.
That is so so strange. I have only touched my SiL’s and snister’s belly, and that was after asking! I can’t believe people just touch it!
Ha! Yeah, hopefully people do offer it without being weird about it!
Totally a rude question! And I don’t think you look pregnant.
Yeah. Thanks, I don’t think I do either. LOL.
Also agree its rude. For the record you do not look pregnant not even a little! I never ever comment on anyones apparently except to say oh you look nice today or something similar. Why do random people think being super personal is ok??
I think that is why I wasn’t as put off by this as I might be, because the person also told me some VERY personal things about one of their kids so I think they just don’t have the typical boundaries (of what you discuss with people who aren’t close with, ha).
OH MY GOD. People, you never ask that question!!! Heck, you really shouldn’t ask the opposite (“have you lost weight?”) because that person could be dealing with a serious illness. SMALL TALK, unless it’s someone you are really close with…and then, you ask someone else if that person is pregnant or is dieting or whatever. It’s not that complicated!
For the record, that is a cute top and you look fantastic. I’d take your “pregnant” look in a heartbeat!
Yes! I was thinking about that as too, that I hate when people only comment on my appearance when I’ve lost weight. I do it for me, not for them. Why are they paying attention? And yes, even better point that it could mean an illness! I know someone dealing with that now 🙁
LOL, thank you 🙂
Ugh, I agree, you never ask someone that! Weird how some people never develop boundaries or think their curiosity makes it ok to potentially make other people uncomfortable.
It IS weird. It’s not like there was a cultural explanation for it, you know?
You look fab! Love the shirt! I can’t get over how rude people are. I don’t understand how asking something so personal is ok. I don’t get people’s obsession with “outing” people as pregnant or their obsession with other peoples bodies. It’s so gross. I’m glad it didn’t affect you at all or make you want to change. F*ck them!
Thanks! 🙂 I also don’t get noticing how people look enough to notice these things unless it was a REALLY obvious bump, that you couldn’t not notice! I guess some people are just always looking for that…
I love that shirt and think you look amazing! I don’t know what that person’s problem is. Does anyone really think it’s acceptable to ask such personal questions? WTH.
Thanks 🙂 And this person really did think it was okay! Weird, right? It wasn’t a family member (who I probably still wouldn’t want asking) or a friend!
The shirt is so cute, it doesn’t look billowy. You are looking very fit my friend, no worries…
I’ve been asked that question several times. It is aggravating!! Back in 2009 when I gained about 25 lbs. I got asked a lot! I would say, nope just fat and they would usually turn red. Don’t ask next time.
Oh I have to tell you – after i had my son i was in grocery store in maternity clothes and I weighed close to 200 lbs and i still looked pregnant – my son was about 5 or 6 weeks old… a person in line asked me when I was due and I started crying! Hormones LOL I bet they keep their mouth shut and don’t ask anymore LOL
See – and that is why people shouldn’t ask! Because you may have gained weight or be carrying pregnancy weight. Man, I think anyone would have reacted that way if they got asked that with your baby right there!!!!!!
Wow. Just…wow. Cute shirt, though!
LOL, thanks! 🙂
AHHH WHAT? WHY!!!!
Ditto to all the comments about the cute shirt – and I actually think that a lot of shirts look better (or ‘hang’ better) not tucked in. I also wouldn’t say that you were channeling a “billowy” look.
I had a friend who was about 9 months pregnant (seriously) and the grocery store cashier asked her “When are you due?”. She looked at him and said “What are you talking about?” He was SO embarrassed – she then told him that she was due at any moment. Still, it was a good lesson (maybe?).
I am happy for that trend – tucked in doesn’t look that great on me!
OMG, that is hilarious. LOLOLOL
I learned the hard way NEVER to ask that question. Lesson learned. 🙂