I don’t mind training someone or explaining things to them. I actually look forward to how it serves as a refresher to me, and may even open my eyes to new ideas.

BUT, I don’t feel like I am a good trainer. I don’t feel like I explain things very well! I’ve really been struggling with being articulate lately. And by lately, I mean for most of my life. Sure, I am gregarious, but when you put me in front of a group, there might be a few extra words thrown in.

I was talking to my ex-neighbor* about how I don’t think I am good at training people, and he recommending asking people how they liked to be trained. Do they prefer hands on? Reading a document? Watching someone else perform the task first?

I thought that was really good advice. So I want to ask you to help me out as well:

What qualities should a good trainer have?

Whether it’s at work, or a coach, a teacher, or even a mentor, what have your favorite trainers been like? What did they do/not do that worked/didn’t work for you?

*Sniff sniff – they moved to New Mexico!

• schedule
• routine
• day-to-day consistency
• making my own to-do list and following it

I don’t handle very well:

• major interruptions
• crises (whether real or exaggerated)
• people dumping their stress on me
• THINGS BEING OUT OF MY CONTROL

I am just being honest here. I struggle with a fear of the unknown. Not the unknown of what is going to happen in my life, but the unknown of “how far off schedule am I going to get today?”

I live in this imaginary place in my mind, where I get to actually control my own schedule, make a to-do list, and follow it. Sure, I enjoy the occasional interruption, or unplanned event. I am not that stiff and rigid.

But I HATE IT when I feel like I have no control over my day. More and more lately I feel like my entire day is being flushed down the drain because there are so many interruptions/too much drama to deal with. I actually found myself thinking earlier this week “I hope no one bothers me today.”

Whoa – I think it might be time to reassess my situation. Hoping that no one bothers me says something about me – I am worn out and stressed to the point that I am not doing a very good job with human interaction.

Any tips on helping me be more flexible and “go with the flow”? Do you ever struggle with fear of the unknown/things being out of your control?

I don’t worry too much about the food and drinks. I know I will be able to get a vegan meal at the restaurant (I called on Monday to check) and I will bring my own food to the potluck and not have anything at the other party. Really, the point is to have fun and socialize.

And that is what I worry about, a bit. I know I will be fine socializing at the team lunch and floor potluck, because I know people. But trying to navigate the company party and talk to people is difficult. And I’m not shy! I’m pretty friendly and open, and am rarely at a loss for things to talk about*. I just have not mastered the art of joining a conversation already in process, and since our company has a lot of groups, that is a lot of what the party is. I aimlessly wander around, trying hard not to stick with just my group, but struggle to break into conversations with the few people I do know outside of my group…

There was actually a great article about social anxiety in the December issue of Women’s Health containing a lot of tips about interacting with strangers/coworkers. One of the best tips (which is not in that link) was on how to break away from a conversation, by saying something like “There are a few other people I’d like to say hello to. I had a great time talking to you. I’ll catch you later.” That is definitely something I’ve been trying to figure out how to tactfully say! If you’re not careful, you’ll be talking to the same person all night!

The other tips (actually in the link) were to “play mind games,” “try a new tactic,” and “work the room” (I guess you’ll have to read it for those to make sense!). But the tip I needed wasn’t there – how to join a conversation that has already started.

Are you attending any Office Holiday Parties this year? Do you look forward to them or dread them? Do you ever feel like you have a hard time breaking into a conversation? What are your tactics? Have any tips for me?!

*This could be seen as good OR bad.

I sure did!

I really don’t have any room to complain though. I didn’t have to work a single full week for the entire month of November (I have two full weeks this month though).

Besides, if it was last week, the holiday festivities would just be that much further away!

But those 3-day work weeks ARE nice! December really wears me out, and it would be great to have a few extra days off to prepare for the holidays and chill.

Side Note: Don’t forget to enter my Eating Animals Giveaway!

But I asked how young these people were that they were having issues with – 24.

I’m 25.

Hee hee. So I mentioned that in my office, we have a large workforce of “trainees” – younger people in the 20s age group that are actually doing a lot of hard work. The Trainee Program is a two or three year program in which you have a coach and mentor, and actually get to do different “rotations” in the office to see what area of work best suits you, and to help you become a more diverse employee.*

We had a “Trainee Forum” in August. It was a lot of seminars, but also networking between the trainees. I was amazed to find out a lot of the people I work with are trainees. I assumed that because of their professionalism, they had already made it through the Trainee Program.

Anyway, the things they were complaining about wasn’t actually news to me. I’ve heard these statistics about the younger workforce – they’re more lazy, they have less dedication and bad attitudes, there’s no work loyalty, etc. And I’ve definitely witnessed it! I guess it just made me realize how lucky, and proud I should be to work for a company where this is not the case in the younger workers.

Have you witnessed any of these myths of younger workforce? Are they myths at all?

Correction on yesterday’s post: Steven did not bribe the kids with cookies to get out of the street. He asked them to get out of the street, then offered them fresh cookies, so he wouldn’t seem mean (I think? I wasn’t there).

*I realize I am very lucky to have been given this opportunity.

Mommy, don’t go!

Originally, I was scheduled to do this training with someone from another division that I don’t know. But, fate changed, and I ended up getting to go with my favorite work friend! She works in a different division now, but when I started, she kind of showed me the ropes. We think we’re pretty lucky that we got to come to DC together!

When we got here last night, we decided to squeeze in a visit to the Washington National Cathedral.

Washington National Cathedral

Washington National Cathedral

We arrived fairly late in the evening, so mass was starting. We could hear their beautiful singing and organ playing from the back of the cathedral. The sound really resonated throughout the space.

We spent a bit of time walking around inside and around the cathedral, but I realized I still feel a bit burned out from all of the church/cathedral visiting I did in Rome/Europe. It’s not like once you see one, you’ve seen them all… but to me, they just aren’t as exciting the second time around. They’re still magnificent and beautiful, just maybe not as awe inspiring.

We were starving after visiting the Cathedral, and visited the first place by Dupont Circle that looked appetizing – some place called “DC Cafe,” where I got a falafel pita. Nom nom nom. I need to quit eating these things.

I had a falafel pita on Friday too!

My lifestyle on travel feels so different than at home – I have a per diem to cover my food for the day (it’s very generous) and I have a 2 minute commute… that doesn’t require me to get into any sort of vehicle. Now, if only the bed was comfortable…

Does anyone have any recommendations for “must-sees”* during my very short and limited trip? I have already contacted my senator to ask for tickets to visit the Capitol, and would like to go to the top of the Washington Monument, and perhaps visit the Holocaust Memorial Museum… but that’s it. Okay, that’s a lot.

But, Steven will be there too, and he doesn’t have to be in training all day, so you can give some recommendations for him (his brother is adamant that he visit the Air and Space Museum)!

Thanks!

*Or “must-dos,” but please keep in mind that I am not the partying type.

To find out who is stealing people’s lunches.

I am serious.

Does anyone else find this hilarious?

Surprisingly, I have not yet been a victim. No one seems interested in my veggie sticks, hummus, and vegan hot dogs!

This morning, I was riding the elevator with a man and a woman that I don’t know, when one started talking to the other about a building project that my team worked on. The woman asked the man, “Did your team work on that project?”

“Oh, no, no, no,” he defended himself. “I wasn’t involved, but it is my understanding that A LOT of effort went into the decision making.”

“Well, it sure doesn’t look like it!” she responded. The she went on a bit about her ideas for the design.

I had one of those internal dialogues like “should I say something?” The thing is, the project had SO MANY people involved that my team really struggled with it. We were trying to please many different people (all with different opinions!) at once. BUT, all of that doesn’t matter; I still think we did a good job.

So when the guy got off the elevator (after she ranted a bit more), I said, “MY team worked on that project…” kind of inviting her feedback, not that it mattered. The decision was made.

“Oh! Sorry! I just think…” blah blah blah. She went on again about how she liked things the way they were. I just kind of laughed to myself.

You have to be careful what you’re saying. You never know who you’re around!

Earlier this week, I was walking back from a job-site meeting with two coworkers, and I asked who would be managing the project after us. When one of them responded with the person’s name, I said, “Oh, great! It seems like he has a really good understanding of the project.”

Well, after I said that, they went on a bit about one of his coworkers they don’t like as much. And… guess who walked up behind us right after that? The guy who would be managing the project after us. Nice.

I think these conversations are best behind closed doors, and even then, I wonder…

Yesterday was my second quarterly panel report, so I wore a skirt/suit outfit. Then there was a discussion within my team about the merits of wearing a skirt. Some people actually have very strong opinions about wearing or not wearing a skirt. I was kind of surprised. But kind of not. Because some people just like to present their opinions in that strong manner.

Anyway, I have a big box in my closet full of skirts. I got it down this morning and pulled out one of my favorites – this brown/black/orange/white floral print from H&M.

I’ve had this skirt a couple of years, but I just can’t find the right top to wear with it.

With the heat we’ve been having, I’ll probably be wearing skirts more often this summer than I normally would. I just hope I don’t get too much flak about it. Because people generally don’t like to be teased about what they are wearing. Or really, even have it noticed, unless it’s to give a compliment.

*Will they ever NOT rub together…?