With which “tribe” do you want to be identified… if any?

By , November 13, 2014 6:31 am

Crazy how much the closing statement of an article can make me think so much about “tribe,” labels, and branding.

In Rachel Toor’s December Running Times column (pdf here), she compares the “excessive celebrations” of football to the ways runners display their accomplishments. It inevitably comes around to the way runners sometimes celebrate themselves (and their feats) on social media, or by putting a 13.1 or 26.2 sticker on their car, or by wearing their medal or race shirt around. She ends the article saying she misses the subtlety of an old giant Timex Ironman watch she used to wear, because it identified her to the tribe of runner without being so “in your face” about it (now she uses her phone and a Garmin instead). 

Tribe. What a perfect way to put it. 

There are many tribes to which we can choose to identify ourselves with – the type of exercise you do, what you eat, what you drink, if you have kids or not, if you have pets or not, the types of activities you do (or don’t do), your religion… you get the idea. But! How do we identify ourselves to these tribes, and… do we want to?

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Like Toor, I personally prefer subtlety in my tribe identification. Ha ha, funny I say that, since I have the tribe of running permanently inked on my back, but that is not going to be visible that often.  I like the tribe reveal to be more organic, like a few weeks ago, when wearing an old pair of running shoes (to change out of, obvs) to a meeting caused a contractor to ask me what I think of those shoes, and ask me about running.

Subtlety (actually, privacy) is something I’ve started to prefer over the last few years, really, as social media has expanded. It’s blatant that people are making assumptions about me based on what I put out there (and how they interpret it), so I really don’t put much of critical substance in the interwebs. 

And that is the risk with tribe identification, and why I avoid being identified as part of some of the tribes I could. We identify in the first place, because it makes us feel good to belong. It feels good to be part of a group. It feels good to say, “I did that!” or “I don’t do that!” or “I made that!” or “I drink that!” or “I believe that!” or whatever. And have people relate. 

And it gives you power. By claiming a tribe, you are taking control over your identification/personal branding. But you are also giving power to other people, to make assumptions about you, based on what they already think about that tribe. Confusing, right? So do you claim or tribe, or not?

Not that we should give a crap about other people’s assumptions. But, it may still make you think twice about which tribes you identify with! That is why I avoid the tribe of vegan. I don’t go out of my way to tell people I am vegan. Vegans have a pretty negative connotation, and I can totally see why. A lot of them that I’ve met have been judgmental a-holes.  Which is a shame, because “vegan” can be a really useful label to use, when trying to explain your dietary preferences. Too bad it’s so damn loaded of a word. 

Now that you’ve read this far (if you made it through the blabbering), you can probably think of some tribe identification you have seen in other people. I see it A LOT. And unfortunately, some of it is people forcing themselves to do things to identify with that tribe, despite not liking it, or preferring it. I see this a lot in the health and fitness arena, and honestly, it concerns me. People who really want to do a certain exercise, because they want to be seen as someone who does that… despite hating the exercise. Or people who follow a certain diet, and struggle with it, but want to be seen as “healthy.” I am sure you’ve seen it to. 

I encourage everyone to follow what Torr said in her column – “We each get to figure out how much cheering we require and get it where we can.” Do what you need. Identify with the tribes you need to, how you want to. Post away on Facebook if you need to! Don’t, if you don’t like it. Share what you want. Keep things private. Whatever. Just don’t get too lost from the tribe of you! That’s the most important tribe with which to identify. 

14 Responses to “With which “tribe” do you want to be identified… if any?”

  1. I am not sure I have a great comment but I find this interesting and agree with much of what you say. I tend to keep a lot of things that would assign me to a tribe tight lipped. My stuff is my stuff and I don’t want people to project their opinions on to me based on just one thing. I also find it all so limiting. Maybe I take the easy way out but I don’t want to feel required to believe or follow all the things of one “tribe” (religion, political party, group). I want to do what I want.

    • kilax says:

      Well, I think that is a great comment… cause I completely agree. It’s why I stay away from the vegan tribe. Some of those people are so pushy and mean and always telling others what to eat… that is not me. Eat what you want!

  2. Tiina says:

    I think the biggest thing is to own your tribe. It’s the only way to have power over it. But on the other hand, who cares what others think? I’m very torn on this…

  3. Chaitali says:

    I post milestone races/runs on facebook once in a while but I try not to do it often. Mostly because I’m a new runner, haven’t been athletic in the past, and many of my friends on there wouldn’t necessarily identify as athletic. But if I can do it, so can they! As far as identifying as part of a tribe, I try to keep that more controlled because it’s contextual. There are times I’ll want to be identified in a certain way and times I won’t. I want that to remain in my control as to when I identify.

    • kilax says:

      That is the thing! IF you post, you might encourage someone. But you also might alienate people. LOL. We should all just do what makes US feel good. I like to think I encourage people, but would feel icky about trying to be purposefully “inspiring,” you know?

      Good point! We are not all one thing, all the time!

  4. Michelle says:

    I like to think I belong to many different types of tribes, because I have several hobbies/past times/passions that are a huge part of my life. I’d say I am part of the running, cooking, and occassional photography tribes. Great post.

  5. Amy says:

    Interesting post, Kim! I’m sitting here thinking that I don’t think I have ever felt like I belonged to a tribe, though…

  6. Kristina says:

    I have yet to read the article, but I do think that the “tribe” identification is interesting. As I’ve been more involved in triathlon, I’ve become more aware of rifts between runners and triathletes and also “pure” cyclists and triathletes. I feel like saying “Can’t we just get along?!”. Also, I’ve resisted (so far) any stickers on the car that will identify any interests or races. Along the same lines, I don’t have a sticker with the name of the school where I work, although plenty of other teachers do. So, I guess I identify with tribes, but I don’t need other people to know what tribe I’m a part of.
    Finally, I love that last point.

    • kilax says:

      Oh gosh. Isn’t that funny how the athletes tear each other apart? Kind of makes me think of (what I have heard about) moms being so mean to each other. You would think they would band together against child-free people, like me, but no, they pick on each other. Athletes, too!

      Yeah, I identify, but don’t need other people to know. Unless we strike up a conversation, of course! 🙂

  7. Pam says:

    Hmmmmm…… I don’t think I’ve ever really been part of a “tribe.” There are groups of people that I share common interests with, but only to an extent. I’m not fast or accomplished enough to be in the running tribe; I don’t have a gazillion fosters, so I don’t fit into the rescue tribe; and I might negligently have a bite of dairy here and there, so I’m DEFINITELY not part of the vegan tribe. And as I type this, the more okay I am with it. haha I’ve got enough stressors without having to worry about living up to someone else’s standards!

  8. kim says:

    Great post, Kim! I love being part of the tribe of runners at large, but for the most part I tend to refrain from picking a tribe bc I want the freedom to just be me, or I don’t want others to feel left out.

  9. jan says:

    Funny, I was just thinking about this yesterday when I was thinking of getting personalized license plates and wondering what to put on them. What AM I? A teacher? A runner? Both are definitely “tribes” with some of the characteristics you mentioned. Still, I am proud to be both. I don’t think I’m one more than the other. Oh, and I’m crazy dog lady too.

  10. Erin says:

    That is a very interesting distinction between “belonging” to a tribe and advertising that you belong to it. I also agree with you that a person’s desire to belong to a tribe and find ways to announce it all the time can take over who they really are and what they really (if that tribe isn’t a good fit for them, I mean). Personally, that’s one of the reasons I had to step back from being such a hardcore running club member. I liked the tribe but I didn’t like how it had begun to define me.

    Of course, I still have the 13.1 and 26.2 stickers on my car because those make me smile no matter what other people think 🙂

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