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By kilax, December 21, 2009 4:56 am

Every time I’m about to hit “publish” on this rant post I have drafted out, I end up with some surprise I’d rather blog about. First it was from my mom, and then last week, I got a wonderful surprise almost every single day! I think this is a sign from the universe – save that rant-y post for January, Kim… have some holiday spirit…

I received the first gift was from my blogger buddy Gina on Monday. I have been blogger buddies (well, we call each other blogger sisters) with Gina and Courtney for over three years. We write group emails almost every week, exchange holiday and birthday gifts and cards, and hope hope hope that the three of us can meet up someday (Gina is in New York and Courtney is in Texas).

Appropriately, Gina sent me Julie & Julia – the movie about Julia Childs and the blogger Julie Powell! I had not seen the movie, and I was so so excited when I opened it! She sent it along with vegan popcorn and a thoughtful card. How lucky I am to have a friend like that?! Steven and I really enjoyed watching the movie. It made me hungry though!

What does Data think of Julie & Julia?

He likes it!

Then on Wednesday at work, one of my team members brought in holiday treats for us all. She was thoughtful enough to make me vegan gingersnaps!

Isn’t the packaging cute?

Nom Nom Nom. Looks like something you’d buy in a store!

On Thursday, I received Lindsay’s copy of The Reader, which she is loaning me. I sent her a book of mine to borrow, so we are doing a fun little exchange.

And then Friday a holiday package from Lauren arrived (we participated in Morning Runner’s blogger gift exchange). WOW. Lauren HOOKED ME UP! DUH! How could I have forgotten she works IN a running store???!!! She sent me Saucony socks, Adidas headbands, a “run” keychain, and some prickly pear cactus candies which I am super excited to try. Isn’t that the best gift ever?! I really got lucky in drawing Lauren’s name. I have been having a lot of fun getting to know her through her blog. I love how down to earth she is and the great attitude she has. Check her out if you don’t already read her blog!

On Saturday, there was yet another package, from Courtney, wrapped in adorable “Meowy Christmas” paper!

And inside of an adorable Santa tin! What could it be, Data and I wonder…

Homegrown pecans! WOW! I cannot imagine how long it took to shell all of those! What a thoughtful gift! Steven and I are thinking about using them to make baklava!

Yes, I show Data all of the packages. He is curious.

We also received a ton of holiday cards this week, many from thoughtful bloggers, along with those from family and friends. THANK YOU EVERYONE!!!

How lucky I am to have received all of this? Who am I to even consider ranting about the small things in life when I have such a wonderful network of supportive friends? I am so grateful for these relationships! And I am grateful for each and every one of you who take the time to leave comments and develop an online relationship with me. It really makes my day to read your insight and feedback to my ramblings! Thank you!!!

Have you received any surprises lately? Does this time of year make you stop and think about the things in life for which you are grateful?

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By kilax, December 19, 2009 6:21 am

For me anyway! It’s never Point A to Point Z. It’s Point A to Point K, then oops, I started out too strong, back to Point C, trudging along to Point Z again, and I never get there…

Hmm, what the hell am I talking about?

With 2010 approaching I have been thinking about how I want the “new” year to be. I am not the type to make resolutions, or really even goals, but I am the type to dream ahead of what my future might have in store. And to do that, you kind of have to evaluate the past.

So I’ve been thinking about all of the journeys I’ve tried to take in my life. Journeys to improve my health. Journeys to improve relationships. Journeys to improve skills. Journeys to improve my personal characteristics. Usually, during these journeys, especially in the beginning, I am speeding along, making great progress… until I hit a snag and I fizzle out a bit. What causes that? Is it boredom? Is it exhaustion? Is it lack of progress?

Or is it just me, jumping into things too fast, too enthusiastically, too anxiously?

Whatever it is, it has resulted in a lot of non-linear journeys. My journeys are riddled with setbacks, re-dos and start-overs, and it’s hard to get back on track. I know that is part of life’s overall journey. You aren’t ever really allowed to go from Point A to Point Z. You don’t continually increase your running mileage forever. You don’t lose 2 pounds per week in an even manner. You don’t become more understanding without one or two blow-outs. You don’t always say the right thing.

But, I want to work on this. I want to work on my consistency. And generally, being less anxious about things. I would love to be calm. I would love to have an image of what I want 2010 to be like, but not be in a rush to make it all happen. And not be disappointed when it turns out differently – you know it will! And I know there will be bumps in the road, I just hope they will be smaller bumps.

Do you feel like there are linear and non-linear journeys in life? How do you deal with setbacks?

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By kilax, December 16, 2009 4:17 am

There was an interesting article about bad gift-giving and how it can be straining on marriages this Tuesday in the Wall Street Journal. I found it humorous, but also, disappointingly sexist – both for men and women.

The article gives the classic examples of “bad” gifts given to wives from their husbands – vacuum cleaners, over-sized sleepwear, cooking pots, golf clubs, etc. Those stories are always good for a laugh or two.

But I felt like the whole article made men sound like thoughtless idiots who don’t listen to their wives, think twice about what they are getting them, or care if they are given a “bad” gift. It made women sound like they are overly emotional about receiving a “bad” gift, elusive about what they want, and the perfect gift givers.

Well, I always say “stereotypes are stereotypes for a reason,” but come on*. I know this isn’t true in our relationship. Since we’ve been together (7 years) I have not been able to get Steven the “perfect” holiday** gift. First it was an XBox. Then a printer. Specialty items for the Saab. A nice watch. A Garmin. So on and so forth. Run-of-the-mill things. How do we measure the worth of a gift? By the excitement of the person opening it? By how much they use it? How much they talk about it? If they thank you?

Steven has given me amazing, thoughtful gifts. Probably the most amazing was the first thing he ever gave me – a handmade box for holding my drawing pencils. He made that!

So, I am not anti gift-giving or saying I am awful at giving gifts, but… maybe it’s not all that important, in the long run. Maybe it’s not something worth getting upset about. Maybe we should just be excited when someone was thoughtful and generous enough to get us something. You can tell when it is sincere and from the heart, not matter how good or “bad” it is.

What do you think? Are these gift-giving stereotypes true?

*I would love to see this article include some examples of same-sex relationships as well. I wonder what the gift-giving stereotypes are there.
**Steven, it doesn’t help that your birthday is THREE days before Christmas!

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By kilax, March 19, 2009 6:03 pm

Yesterday was my First Quarterly Panel review (the event for which I was writing the dreaded report).

Guess what? I ended up dreading the review in the same way I dreaded writing the panel report. I don’t get nervous about presenting things or talking to people, but this was just something I wasn’t looking forward to. A lot of emphasis is put on the importance of the presentation, so I was under a lot of stress and pressure, along with my other HUGE work load.

But, it went extremely well. I presented to 7 people, talked about what I’ve been doing and learning for the last three months, for about 2o-25 minutes, then they asked me a series of questions.

You know what? I actually enjoyed being up there, talking to everyone about my projects, and what I like about working for the company. One member of the audience asked me if there was anything I dislike and would like changed, and I honestly could not think of one thing*.

Everyone told me I did a great job, and one person told me he liked how energetic I am. My team leader stopped at my desk after the presentation (I got to my desk first, because they sit in the conference room after you leave to talk about you!) and told me I made her feel “very proud.”

I think I’ll actually look forward to my next panel report – that was a pretty good day.

But work’s still kicking my ass.

Do you have to do presentations at your office? Do you dread them or love to share with other people? I wonder if part of me is just craving some human interaction. I’ve been buzzing off of it lately.

*Oh sure, I have daily gripes and can bitch and cuss, but that would be at ANY job. I love my company and the way it’s set up.