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By kilax, December 29, 2009 5:14 am

According to the article “Lose the Weight: Are Your Friends a Fat Influence?” in the January issue of Women’s Health, our friends’ health decisions have a huge effect on us. So huge that the World Health Organization has listed them as a determinant of health, having as big of an influence as genetics and income level.

When I read that, I thought “Ha ha! That doesn’t affect me!”*

But then I started thinking outside of the realm of the article – about how my eating changes when I am around family. Then it hit – holy crap… their habits do affect me. When I see someone eating more, I feel like I should eat more too. When I see someone with a full plate, I feel like my plate should be full. It’s just an automatic response for me.

The article says that:

Consciously or unconsciously, people look to others when deciding what and how much to eat, and how much weight is too much.

Part of the reason we’re so easily swayed may be hardwired. Gregory Berns, M.D., Ph.D., a professor of psychiatry and economics at Emory University, found that when others influence us, the area of our brain that makes conscious decisions is not activated. Instead, the occipital lobe, where vision originates, lights up. Translation: We focus on what we see other people doing (like biting into a cupcake), not what we know is right for ourselves (biting into an apple).

So, our brains are working against us. I can believe that. I know that I often feel like I need to eat, when I am really just “fake hungry” and looking to fill some other void with food.

And unfortunately, I could relate to this:

In some cases, we may even seek out relationships that allow us to indulge, says Susan Bowerman, R.D., of UCLA’s Center for Human Nutrition. “Many women have ‘food friends’ they can call up to say, ‘I had a lousy day and some fried mozzarella sticks sure would make me feel better.'”

I had a “food friend” in college. I could pig out around her and not feel bad. Unfortunately, it didn’t have to be after a “lousy” day. It was often a weekly date!

Of course, the article mentions that this influence can be beneficial as well – your friends’ good habits can rub off on you. And in the end, it is your responsibility to make your own decisions about food, no matter how hard that is.

Ugh. It is hard. But it’s important to learn how to live in the real world and not some imaginary safe place in your head. As private as we want our food consumption to be, it really isn’t in our society.

What do you think about the article? Do you feel like your friends/family influence the way you eat? What are your tips for dealing with “fat influences**”?

*Mostly because I don’t have many friends to hang out with!
**Their term, not mine.

Comments (31)

By kilax, December 16, 2009 4:17 am

There was an interesting article about bad gift-giving and how it can be straining on marriages this Tuesday in the Wall Street Journal. I found it humorous, but also, disappointingly sexist – both for men and women.

The article gives the classic examples of “bad” gifts given to wives from their husbands – vacuum cleaners, over-sized sleepwear, cooking pots, golf clubs, etc. Those stories are always good for a laugh or two.

But I felt like the whole article made men sound like thoughtless idiots who don’t listen to their wives, think twice about what they are getting them, or care if they are given a “bad” gift. It made women sound like they are overly emotional about receiving a “bad” gift, elusive about what they want, and the perfect gift givers.

Well, I always say “stereotypes are stereotypes for a reason,” but come on*. I know this isn’t true in our relationship. Since we’ve been together (7 years) I have not been able to get Steven the “perfect” holiday** gift. First it was an XBox. Then a printer. Specialty items for the Saab. A nice watch. A Garmin. So on and so forth. Run-of-the-mill things. How do we measure the worth of a gift? By the excitement of the person opening it? By how much they use it? How much they talk about it? If they thank you?

Steven has given me amazing, thoughtful gifts. Probably the most amazing was the first thing he ever gave me – a handmade box for holding my drawing pencils. He made that!

So, I am not anti gift-giving or saying I am awful at giving gifts, but… maybe it’s not all that important, in the long run. Maybe it’s not something worth getting upset about. Maybe we should just be excited when someone was thoughtful and generous enough to get us something. You can tell when it is sincere and from the heart, not matter how good or “bad” it is.

What do you think? Are these gift-giving stereotypes true?

*I would love to see this article include some examples of same-sex relationships as well. I wonder what the gift-giving stereotypes are there.
**Steven, it doesn’t help that your birthday is THREE days before Christmas!

Comments (31)

By kilax, December 10, 2009 5:16 am

The December issue of Shape* has an article titled “Eat what you want and still lose weight!” with nine somewhat tired strategies to “celebrate the season without feeling deprived – and may(be) even drop 5 pounds in the process!”

Ha. Ha ha.

Tip #8, “Keep Your Focus” is about not being preoccupied when you eat. “Give your full attention to the conversation or sit down to concentrate on the food in front of you – you’ll appreciate it more.”

Makes sense, right? But then they throw this in:

Where you sit a dinner matters too. Try snagging the chair next to your brother’s cute friend: A new study published in the journal Appetitefound that women who ate in the presence of a man consumed 358 fewer calories than when they dined with a group of women. Researchers at Canada’s McGill University say women often suppress their eating in front of a person of the opposite sex.

Okay. This struck me the wrong way. It’s all fine and dandy if this study is true. BUT, the fact that the magazine is encouraging it?! I think this is something women should get away from! They should feel comfortable eating how they really want to around men. I know the magazine is just including it as a tip, but I think they were better off sticking with “keep your focus” and “be mindful of conversation.”

And, really? I am more self-conscious around some women than men!

What do you think? Do you think the study is accurate? Do you think it’s a good tip? What are your holiday tips for not going overboard with food?

Here’s a tip that wasn’t included: become a vegan so you can’t eat anything at all during the holidays! Ha ha, I am just joking around, but it IS particularily bad at the office holiday potluck. Almost every dish has meat in it. I bring my own food from home for the parties.

Note: After I wrote this, I found an article on the same topic on The Great Fitness Expermient (she pretty much came to the same conclusion as me). I was going to do a similar poll, but decided not to since there was one up there.

*What is with all of the magazine references, Kim?! This is what happens when you have two flights in one day and are stuck in the airport for awhile!

Comments (5)

By kilax, October 7, 2009 12:42 pm

It’s frustrating that running is not as easy as it used to be. I AM grateful that my shin doesn’t hurt (as much as it did before – a slight pain is still there) and I KNOW it will get easier with time.

But right now, my mind remembers how much I loved it and how easy it used to be. Then I get on the treadmill and it’s not what I remember. And I struggle – mentally – not physically.

Today I ran 1.5 miles. I wanted to run 2, but felt like I was pushing it, and as I mentioned, felt mentally defeated.

But, I am looking on the bright side – I can’t expect to recover instantly. And 1.5 miles is pretty good for someone who hasn’t been running in the past two months. I have to take small, baby steps.

I always feel encouraged when I work on in the office gym. Now, this is going to sound weird, but hear me out. I’ve noticed that most of the women who use the locker room are very comfortable with their bodies. They are not worried if someone else sees them naked. They even stand around and have conversations about exercise while they are drying off or getting dressed. I’ve never been too shy about my body, so this doesn’t weird me out (like it does some people). It actually makes me feel good about myself, seeing other women being so comfortable with who they are. Just thought I would share that…